Just Do You

Because we always have choices…

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Posts Tagged ‘Choices’

I’m Scared…My Friends Are In Charge

Posted by georgiannasaysjustdoyou on June 10, 2013


One day, I woke up, and my friends were in charge… A high school classmate is my city mayor, another friend is a CEO, many other friends own their own companies… Other classmates are my kids teachers.

I am officially scared. This is not because I don’t have confidence in their ability to lead or do a competent job. It is because our parachutes are slowly retiring, or are otherwise not around. It is the beginning of the shift to the next generation. I will own that depending on your age, this may not apply anymore or yet. For those of us 30-50ish, this is our current reality. This is when you remember how you were treated BY others (yes way back in high school) and even more importantly, you reflect on how YOU treated others.

If you have ever been to a high school reunion, you know that people hold on to stuff for a VERY LONG TIME. It is often deep and very personal. If the experience is good, good will often continue to follow. If not, then…let’s just say that the stuff I overheard while in the bathroom stall at my last reunion, tells me that it won’t be good.

No matter what stage you are in on the course of your life, how you treat people matters. And who knows, one day those people you went to school with will be in charge.

My thought for the day: be kind. It is always worth it.

I don’t have the answers, but I always have thoughts. Won’t you share yours?

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Posted in Choices, Motivational, Self-Reflection | Tagged: , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Facebook Fiction – The Story of You

Posted by georgiannasaysjustdoyou on December 31, 2012


..or is it? I have seen many posts by FB friends lamenting the glorious, fabulous, blessed lives of others. Some even say how tired they are of hearing about everyone else’s perfect lives. Can everyone really be that happy all the time? What really goes on after the deliriously happy log off??? Real life happens.

I am not saying that it is not possible for people to be as happy as they portray online. But not everyone treats their online presence in the same way. For some it is the Newsletter for their life…they share only the highlights and only the things they really want people to know. I have talked with friends who have very strict rules about what they will or will not post. One of my own rules is that I NEVER EVER write anything about my ex. For other people the online presence is a way to “out” their ex or even current partner to the world. I have my reasons, and they have theirs.

My point is, the online presence is a snapshot of what the person wants you to see, some of it real and some of it fiction. It would be dangerous to compare your own real life to the snippets of life shared by others. Just because someone might share only the good and only the highlights, does not mean that they don’t have significant challenges or fight with their partners, or have heavy crap happening in their lives.

Facebook and other online tools are a way for people to connect with each other, and no more. It is not an unabridged autobiography of the lives of the people using them.

Chin up for 2013! Compare yourself to your own goals. Take steps closer to the ones you want to achieve. JUST DO YOU in 2013!

I don’t have the answers, but I always have thoughts. Won’t you share yours?

Posted in Choices, Self-Reflection | Tagged: , , , , | 2 Comments »

ARE YOU AT THE TABLE OR ON THE TABLE?

Posted by georgiannasaysjustdoyou on October 27, 2012


You are probably sick and tired of hearing people telling you to vote. I know I am tired of the attack ads that do nothing to help me chose a candidate, no matter which race or which candidate. They all do it. That doesn’t mean that we don’t still have a right and a responsibility to participate in choosing our representatives in government.

Top five excuses I have heard for folks not registering to vote or being registered and not voting:
1) They are all corrupt.
2) None of the candidates stand for anything I believe in.
3) They never do what they say anyway.
4) The system is rigged.
5) My vote doesn’t matter, X candidate is going to win anyway.

We can tell ourselves whatever we want. The reality is that each voice makes other voices louder or quieter. The more people who say what they want and demand it, the more that message gets heard, one person at a time. You do not have to be college educated, run in political circles or even have a job to participate in your own life. You are either at the table, making your voice heard, or you are on the table. Someone else will decide what is best for you. And you can be mad about it, but it will be your own doing.

Voting is one way to make a difference and sometimes that means choosing the lesser of the evils, or picking the one issue that means the most to you and making sure YOU at least count in that vote. Once the election is over, your role is not done. It doesn’t matter if the candidate you voted for wins or not. You have the right and access to write letters, make phone calls or show up at events and let the elected official know your needs and expectations.

It’s true, life will go on if you never vote and never make a phone call. And the freedoms and access you take for granted can and will disappear.

No matter who you plan to vote for, I urge you to show up and be heard. Participate and be a driving force in your own life. Do not let life happen to you.

I don’t have the answers, but I always have thoughts. Won’t you share yours?

Posted in Choices, Motivational | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

Reckless Forgiveness

Posted by georgiannasaysjustdoyou on October 20, 2012


Every relationship experiences tension at one time or another. And if you are a justice-seeker (like I am), these moments (hours, days) of tension are tough. While I know I am not always right (gasp!), right and wrong are important for me to establish. Letting go is not easy.

You can rally witnesses, friends and family to stand by you and affirm your rightness, but in the end none of them matter. In the end, the relationship is between you and the person you are having tension with…should be easy. Right?

In one of my “moments” of tension, I remembered something my pastor said during our wedding ceremony that continues to serve me well. He told us to love one another and not to just forgive, but to forgive recklessly. I chuckled then, and feel the wisdom of that advice often. Forgive because happiness is more important than always being right…

It may not solve everything. But it has served me well.

I don’t have the answers, but I always have thoughts. Won’t you share yours?

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Posted in Choices | Tagged: , , , | 1 Comment »

Square Peg in a Round Hole

Posted by georgiannasaysjustdoyou on October 1, 2012


So you started a new job, one you were excited to take on…or for whatever reason…needed to take on. And you realize that it is not a fit. You aren’t motivated to come in, you are stressed about your tasks or lack thereof, and so on. Do you quit? Can you afford to quit? Do you search for a new job and not mention this one?

For some people, where they work is just a job that you do from 9-5, you go home and you don’t think about it. For others, this is a post for you. I know that in my years working, I always looked for opportunities that matched my personal mission and passion. If I was going to give up time at home with my children, it had to be for a purpose that I believed in. Earlier in my career, I couldn’t be as selective. I didn’t have 5 different opportunities to choose from. And with this economy, not many of us have the choice of jobs even with lots of experience. I have talked with many friends, colleagues and connections about how unhappy they are in their jobs.

In the May 2012 issue of Forbes magazine, they reported on a survey that found only 19% of those interviewed were happy with their jobs. (http://www.forbes.com/sites/susanadams/2012/05/18/new-survey-majority-of-employees-dissatisfied/)

Are you one of them? If not, what can you do to change that? In the short term, unless you are independently wealthy or have a partner who can absorb the financial hit, you keep working.

Here are some other things for you to consider doing. These are ideas that have been shared with me that my connections tried and recommended while they were trying to move into a more satisfactory role:
– figure out what makes you unhappy at work and if it is fixable, start the process of fixing it
– if it is not fixable, start looking elsewhere
– given that you are (presumably) gainfully employed, take your time and figure out what kind of work and what kind of work environment would make you happy
– don’t burn bridges where you are
– don’t tell them you are looking (all businesses need to look out for their own longevity – I have seen friends fire friends over knowing they where looking)
– the right time to share your search will come up, you will know when the time is right
– if in your search process you feel or sense something is not quite right in the interviews, PAY ATTENTION, it feels that way for a reason – no sense in leaving one bad situation only to take on another
– do your homework, talk to people who have worked where you are looking (use 2nd and third connections through LinkedIn if you must)

Only you will know if making a move is right. As someone who has been in roles both long term and a couple of consecutive short term roles, I understand the stress of “what it looks like” to leave a job quickly. Know yourself, and keep in touch with strong work connections that can give you good advice and serve as references. Be prepared to explain your choices to a potential employer.

When you add up the hours in a week you spend commuting, working and preparing for work, you realize this is as significant as choosing a life partner. It is partially about income, but the other part is about quality of life. You have a choice in what that looks like, though you may not be able to change it immediately you can move in the right direction starting now.

I would love to hear about your experiences of this type of change. The best thing we can do for each other is share our experiences so that others may learn from them. I don’t have the answers, but I always have thoughts. Won’t you share yours?

Posted in Changes, Choices, Self-Care | Tagged: , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Listen to your elders…

Posted by georgiannasaysjustdoyou on April 16, 2010


Something we hate to admit, but do frequently, is that we do not know it all. This theme was the central part of many conversations over the past few months (including yesterday). It is not about just listening to our elders, but listening to our peers as well. There are lots of life experiences that someone else has had and through sharing can help you through.

Some folks were frustrated with the new kids on the block ignoring historical work and perspective or the parent who has been there and done that but the son/daughter won’t listen. It didn’t matter which of the two scenarios, the feelings and messages were the same. Most would tell you that it didn’t matter what direction ultimately got pursued, but the lack of listening and thinking about the experience behind the message was disrespectful.

Even worse, beyond disrespect, not listening and considering can lead you to make uninformed decisions. Yes, everyone has a right to make their own mistakes. Many times, when we do, we fall back on wishing we had sought advice or listened to advice that had been offered.

If someone takes the time to share their experience, I encourage you to take the time to listen. And yes there is a fine line between someone sharing and someone trying to micromanage your life. You can tell the difference, if only you stop to think it through. In the end, the choices you make in your life are your own. The best you can do is have the best information with which to make your choices. Just Do You.

I don’t have the answers, but I always have thoughts.

Posted in Choices | Tagged: , , , | Leave a Comment »

Ch ch ch changes…

Posted by georgiannasaysjustdoyou on April 9, 2010


I thought this to be an appropriate subject given that today is the first day on this new blog site.

Change is a powerful word. So many people want it, resist it, hate it, love it, thrive on it and live for it. It means different things to different people.

Even when people want change and actively ask for it or do things to bring it about, they freak out when it happens.

When I first signed up for facebook, I thought there were a lot of missed opportunities as far as features went. People posted stuff on their status updates complaining about some of the features they didn’t like or wish they had. So, in response, facebook makes some much needed and REQUESTED changes. Makes sense right? I thought subscribers would lose their minds!

I mean how many of us have been invited to a group that calls for going back to the old platform or the old newsfeed or the old this or that (Don’t laugh, you know you joined!)? I mean really, it is a FREE service. It truly does mirror what happens in our every day lives at home, work, school, etc.

I have even gotten feedback about changing my blogger template too often. Sameness, consistency and familiarity give people comfort.

Learning to roll with changes will make you a thriver, not just merely a survivor. Learning to adapt and make the best of what is in front of you will make for a much more pleasant life.

You can’t stop change from happening, but you CAN choose how you handle it.

I don’t have the answers, but I always have thoughts.

Posted in Changes, Choices | Tagged: , , | 1 Comment »