Just Do You

Because we always have choices…

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Posts Tagged ‘advocacy’

Let’s End Victim-Blaming

Posted by georgiannasaysjustdoyou on December 3, 2014

By now, all of you have likely read about the 20 women who have accused Bill Cosby of sexual assault. I have read many posts that worry me about the direction of the conversation.

Even if you aren’t ready to convict Bill Cosby (despite so many women coming forward), it seems that there are a lot of people who have something to say about the victims. So here is my two cents (and I hope it gives at least a moment of self reflection, something you may not have thought of):

None of us are innocent in life, we have all made decisions about what to wear, where to be, who to spend time with , etc, that are questionable and in poor judgement (usually we think it was poor judgment after the fact). Would those decisions make it okay for someone, anyone to rape us?

Victims of sexual assault are imperfect people. No matter what judgement they made that placed them in the path of a predator warrants our judgment of blaming them for the behavior of a predator. Victim blaming is common and some would say it is natural to ask what she (in this case all females) was doing there, or what was she doing with him? or she had motives to get money or get ahead and so there is a lack of sympathy and a hint of or sometimes outright blame. Please reflect before you go there. We don’t have to like the victims, we should hold Bill accountable, which isn’t the same thing as liking the victims.

There is only one person responsible in a rape, that is the rapist. End of story.
While I welcome dialogue, please be respectful as I know this is a hard issue for many.

NO ONE wants to believe that Bill Cosby could do this. So many victims never come forward because their abuser, rapist, etc, is well known and/or well respected. No one will believe them, even worse, people will blame them. Let’s be part of changing a culture that keeps victims silent


Posted in Self-Reflection | Tagged: , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

Thought for the day…

Posted by georgiannasaysjustdoyou on September 15, 2014

“Hate. It has caused a lot of problems in this world but has not solved one yet.” – Maya Angelou

“Think before you post smear campaigns against those you don’t approve of, disagree with or dislike. It doesn’t make people agree with you unless they are already on that path… Present an affirmative position about what you do believe in, and then dialogue can start!” – Georgianna Melendez

Happy Monday!!! — feeling ready

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged: , , , , | Leave a Comment »


Posted by georgiannasaysjustdoyou on October 27, 2012

You are probably sick and tired of hearing people telling you to vote. I know I am tired of the attack ads that do nothing to help me chose a candidate, no matter which race or which candidate. They all do it. That doesn’t mean that we don’t still have a right and a responsibility to participate in choosing our representatives in government.

Top five excuses I have heard for folks not registering to vote or being registered and not voting:
1) They are all corrupt.
2) None of the candidates stand for anything I believe in.
3) They never do what they say anyway.
4) The system is rigged.
5) My vote doesn’t matter, X candidate is going to win anyway.

We can tell ourselves whatever we want. The reality is that each voice makes other voices louder or quieter. The more people who say what they want and demand it, the more that message gets heard, one person at a time. You do not have to be college educated, run in political circles or even have a job to participate in your own life. You are either at the table, making your voice heard, or you are on the table. Someone else will decide what is best for you. And you can be mad about it, but it will be your own doing.

Voting is one way to make a difference and sometimes that means choosing the lesser of the evils, or picking the one issue that means the most to you and making sure YOU at least count in that vote. Once the election is over, your role is not done. It doesn’t matter if the candidate you voted for wins or not. You have the right and access to write letters, make phone calls or show up at events and let the elected official know your needs and expectations.

It’s true, life will go on if you never vote and never make a phone call. And the freedoms and access you take for granted can and will disappear.

No matter who you plan to vote for, I urge you to show up and be heard. Participate and be a driving force in your own life. Do not let life happen to you.

I don’t have the answers, but I always have thoughts. Won’t you share yours?

Posted in Choices, Motivational | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »