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    September 2010
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Worrying Doesn’t Solve The Problem

Posted by georgiannasaysjustdoyou on September 3, 2010

Are you a person who worries a lot?  Can’t sleep at night because you wish you could just make something happen the way you want it to happen?  Most of us do this on some level.  For some of us, our hair jumps off our heads before we have a chance to pull it out!  Bald is beautiful…say it with me!

Worrying is not healthy, but letting stuff go that you can’t control is an art form.  There is no college course you can take.  There are, however, some life lessons that can be shared that can help you get on the right path.

I do not write about this because I have perfected the ability to let stuff go, but with each passing year, I get better at it.  I still get caught up on certain kinds of things, but I am able to remind myself that I can only control so much. Control what you can and let go of what you cannot control.

Think it is too hard?  I will give an example of something that is particularly hard for me.  My children are my number one priority.  So, naturally, anything related to them has the capacity to make me worry.  Their education is critical.  Where they go to school, the type of environment they are in, who they associate with, etc.  If one of them has a challenge that is not being met, I stress.  I can only do so much, and the rest is up to the other factors (such as school leadership, teachers, classmates and of course, my child).

So one of my children has a particular challenge with organization and learning styles.  Large school environments scare me as a parent.  It doesn’t mean my child wouldn’t be successful, it just means that given a choice, I would not put my child in a large school.  Alas, private school tuitions are beyond my reach and the local charter school had a lottery, and of course, my child was way down the list with no hope of getting in.

At this point I could stress all summer and throughout the new school year about the larger school environment and all of my concerns about my child being able to succeed in that environment, which of course affects the chance of what college my child would get into, and then of course what kind of job, and then…you see where I am going with this?  Getting bald just thinking about it.

Instead, I made a conscious decision to let it go right away.  I know myself.  There was nothing I could do about moving my child up the wait list, so I had to focus on strategies for success at the larger school.  It was not easy.  Each time I found my mind wandering and I felt myself worry, I told myself to drop it and did something to distract myself.

School started without a hitch, and then out of nowhere, at the beginning of the new school year, I got the call that my child was being offered a spot at the smaller school.  Crazy, isn’t it?  Now, had I worried, it would have been wasted and I would need a new fabulous wig.  Even if the slot did not open up, I had a plan to help my child succeed.  I had a much healthier summer as a result.

I don’t have the answers, but I always have thoughts.  Won’t you share yours?


3 Responses to “Worrying Doesn’t Solve The Problem”

  1. Linda Reilly said

    Thank you Georgianna I really in joyed this. I have many worries right now and need to let them go. Very helpful. Thank you again!

  2. Thanks Georgianna. Great job. I’ve recently picked up a couple of “nuggets” regarding worry.

    The first is from Brian Tracy, “Worry is negative visualization.”

    Another from Eckhart Tolle, “Worry is the actual cause of problems.”

    Then there’s the old standby, “Worry keeps you busy, but doesn’t get you anywhere.”

    Those are great reminders why to not worry. How do we do that? Practice thinking about what we do want. Worrying is constantly thinking about what we don’t…

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